Berlin Datasheet
Berlin, Germany
Brief Overview of the City
Berlin is one of those cities you'll either love or hate. On one hand it offers affordable accommodation and food, great cultural possibilities, as well as a surplus of bars and clubs. It provides its visitors with an extensive public transportation system, mostly sincere taxi drivers and
if you dare, plenty of space to ride your bike.
On the other hand, Berlin locals ("Ur-Berliner" = originial Berliners) can be a pain. They suffer of a vulgar humor, offensive personalities and share unnecessary comments whenever they can - in their core however, Berliners are very loving people, it's just that their way of expressing appears to be special.
In any case, ever since the Wall fell, Berlin underwent dramatic changes. Both parts of the city still have a distinctive character and atmosphere, but most visitors can only surmise that this island used to be a powder keg in former East Germany.
Chance of Hooking up: 3.5 / 5
Quality of Girls: 3 / 5
Nightlife: 4 / 5
Smoking tolerance: 4.9 / 5
The Women
Due to Germany's history of foreign workers, Berlin disposes of an interesting mix of women. You will find anything from BBBs (Busty Blond Blue-eyed) to middle-eastern types and African chicks. In general however, Berlin will rather surprise you than deliver severe neck pains. Thanks to the masses of tourists invading our city every day, your selection will also supply women from the UK, Spain, USA and South America.
Game
What are the chances of hooking up? 3.5/5
Day game or club game. If you have your own place (no hostel) tourists will be an easy lay. Everything from stacking routines, to being a jerk has worked so far. So stick to your natural game.
Do the girls prefer an aggressive approach or an indirect one?
Both! But really, stick to direct game! If you are an A+ dancer, don't even bother about hitting the bar. You rarely find guys who are able to dance without showing off, but have a great time. Go all out, it will be appreciated!
Nightlife Recommendations
Now, while Berlin supplies you with a trizillion possibilities to go out, there are some guide lines you should stick to:
Berlin used to be and still is a Techno Mecca. Minimal Electro (music geeks out there, forgive me for not being more exact about this shit) can be found all over the city, but the clubbing scene is a bit strange. People tend to dance for themselves or in groups, being conceited seems like a trendy trait and bouncers may reject you for wearing shirts with collars. Now, wait . . . I guarantee you that although some of them may look a bit hipster, hands down you will find some of the most stunning girls around these places:
- Kater Holzig
- Watergate
- Prince Charles
- My favorite: Club zur wilden Renate
- (Horst Kreuzberg)
- (Ritter Butzke)
- Club der Visionäre (Summer)
Don't try: Weekend
What strikes me most about some Berlin clubs is that a lot of people use going out as a way of expressing what they're not. Still, upscale clubs like
- Felix
- Cookies
- Puro
- Asphalt
- 40 seconds
can be the bomb. I like Asphalt because the back room tends to play amazing hip hop. If hip hop is what you dig, also try "Tube".
At last, there are clubs where the you don't have to worry about a dress code, snobby people or special codes:
- Fritzclub
- Matrixx (At the end of New Berlin Pub Crawls for free)
--> Now this club is known to be a shady place. Last time I went was three weeks ago and I wondered about all the hotties, on a Tuesday night....
- Rosis
Day Game Locations
- Alexanderplatz (! on Saturdays and Sundays you'll have aspiring PUAs walking around)
- Any Starbucks
- Open Air Festivals
- Görlitzer Park
- Badeschiff (Summer): A pool built into an old boat, right by the Spree river.
Other
Berlin used to be a brewing capital. Now, there are three our four labels left and almost all of them are crap. Day 1: Get a Schultheiss, Berliner Pilsener, Berliner Kindl, or RexPils so you can tell your buddies that it's crap. A lot of clubs offer their own, micro brewed beer which for the most part is pretty good. Also try Sternburg beer! If you're drunk and out of money, perfect! Locals like to drink Mate (Mate tea + soda and other crap), tastes a bit like sparkling lipton ice tea; preferably, mixed with vodka.
For the you smokers out there: The fastest way to get some weed is by going to parks:
- Görlitzer Park
- Hasenheide
But watch out for bad weed (mixed with brixx, sugar or lead)! I'd advise you to hit up one of the electro clubs and ask around. Berlin is very tolerant about cannabis, so don't be shy.
Personal Experience
By now, I tend to stay about two or three days in Berlin. I have seen most of the city and can't find anything special going on anymore. But don't be fooled, Berlin will always surprise you . . .
The Bottom Line
Perfect for a weekend trip. A lot of people stay (no clue why).
** A more complete Datasheet will follow!
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Berlin stories:
1. Call on a Sunday morning, 4 a.m.
- Do you want to party?
- Sure, why not.
... 4:29 a.m. at the gas station. 0,5l Jäger + 1l Fanta = €12,90
- Watergate, closed. Berghain, empty. We end up at Kater Holzig.
... 7 a.m. Speed, two hits = €15
- 12 a.m. still no sleep.
2. 5 guys (me included) arrive in a Taxi at "Hackescher Markt". A fight breaks out. We get chased by a pimp and two monsters for messing up a hookers business.
3. Asphalt club. A table full of vodka and other drinks, no people. So I sit, drink. A guy sits down next to me. We chat a bit. I leave. People stare at me and ask me where I know this guy from. Obviously, I don't know him. Turns out my new buddy was a soccer play on the German national team.
4. Meet a girl from London at a bar. She invites me to a hotel party, buddy of mine drives. We go the wrong way in a one way street, driving 70kph - 30 kph allowed. "This is not my hotel!", my house.
Olivia at school taught me, she's my hoe, we play at recess.
- Frankie (The Rebound)
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